Ahjoomma

Today, as I was sitting alone (with Abby in stroller) in front of Fantasia, enjoying a nice green milk tea with pearls, I came upon a sudden realization. I'm an ahjoomma now. Growing up, I think Korean Americans all associated the word ahjoomma with a woman who has a short haircut and perm, usually wearing "mom" jeans that hike up all the way up to the waist, and can be spotted picking her teeth with a toothpick in public whilst sporting a very wide-brimmed hot pink visor, an oversized fake Louis Vuitton purse, and sandals with socks. Come on, you've all seen them. Some of them are your mothers!!! My mother is a classic ahjoomma.

But in actuality, the term ahjoomma refers loosely to a woman who is married and has kids. If you're unmarried and still young, you're called "aghashee" or "chunyuh" (which directly translated means "virgin" in English). I remember having these titles from about the end of high school to when I got married. When you're newly married and young (for about the first two years), you're called "shekshee," which is uncannily like the word "sexy" in English.

What if you're not married and have kids? You're an "ahjoomma." The rule is, if you have kids, you're automatically an "ahjooma." What if you're married and never have kids? Somewhere along the way, you become "ahjoomma." What if you're single and not that young, and haven't gotten married? Then you're referred to as "no-chunyuh," which means "old virgin" when directly translated. But this is not something you call someone to their face. I've only heard it in reference to people, when they're not in the same room. It's not supposed to be a good thing in Korean culture, to be a "no-chunyuh." But whatever. It's the 2000s. Let's get over it. If you're in this category, you're eventually called "ahjoomma," because it would be rude and very inappropriate to call you "no-chunyuh."

So this realization that I'm officially an ahjoomma didn't depress me, like I thought it would. I accept this title with pride. Yes, I'm married, no longer "shekshee," and yes, I have a child. I'm AHJOOMMA. However, I say let's re-define what ahjoomma stands for. How about low-rise jeans, medium-length layered hair, a real Kate Spade diaper bag, and no wide-brimmed hot pink visor? Just a little sunblock would do, really.

Anyone with me? Who out there is an ahjoomma? Come on, raise your hand. Be proud of it.

Loan Consolidation

I don't know why I'm so nice to telemarketers and other random people who call to inform me about loan consolidation opportunities. Today I lost a little patience. This woman called to tell me about consolidating my loans by July 1st.

Woman: Is Mrs. Chai there?
Me: This is she.
Woman: I'm calling to tell you about your student loans. You can consolidate.....
Me: I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm not interested.
Woman: Why aren't you interested in consolidating your loans?
Me: Thank you for calling, but I'm not interested.
Woman: I'm not trying to sell you anything. By July 1st, you can consolidate.....
Me: Thank you for informing me about the loan consolidation, but I already know about it.
Woman: Then why aren't you interested in consolidating your loans?
Me: I'm not interested in talking to you about it.

(At this point, I feel really bad that I had to tell her my true feelings. But on the other hand, I feel like I'm nicer than other people who just hang up.)

Woman: I'm sorry to have bothered you.
Me: No problem. Have a nice day!

(I'm trying to let her know that there are no hard feelings. I know she's just doing her job. Maybe I should've just hung up? Or maybe I should use the line that my mom uses: "No speak English.")

By the way, anyone know what's happening with the loan consolidation thing and why July 1st is so significant? I've already consolidated, but can you RE-consolidate??