Saturday, February 25, 2006

Is it too much to require our children to play piano until they're sixteen (Danny says eighteen)? I mean, that's BASE level. We're not going to deprive them of any other activity, sport, or hobby (within reason). They just need to manage it alongside piano. I thought this was very reasonable.

But unfortunately, someone who's staying at our place who shall remain nameless, expressed his opinion about this matter and said that it's too much. He apparently had a traumatic experience with piano lessons that involved tension with parents, lying, cheating, stealing, and all things bad. Hm. Did anyone else have a bad experience with piano?

I think both Danny and I had good experiences with learning piano. I mean, I'll speak for myself. Sure, I pretended I was practicing all afternoon when my mom came home from work. I admit it. Sure, I got mad at her when she forced me to practice, sitting by my side and watching my fingers like a hawk to make sure they were properly curved. But somehow I see now the point of the discipline. Discipline is never fun when you are going through it, but you know that there is a purpose to it. Most of the time, you see it in hindsight. That's what makes discipline difficult. You sometimes don't see the point until later. My mom lovingly disciplined me. All those times that were "negative" - I now look back on them fondly. I guess I'm lucky that they weren't as traumatic as other peoples' experiences. And perhaps I had some internal motivation to help keep me going anyways.

I guess the key for us as parents is to foster a love of music in our children, and then have piano lessons as just the normal thing to do as a result of the love. But if the piano lessons have to occur first in order to cultivate the love, I'm all for it, too.

Monday, February 13, 2006

This is my last week of school before I go on maternity leave. It's bittersweet. I love my kids, and I know they love me. So it's hard to leave. And I absolutely love my job. Every single aspect of it. However, I'm excited about this new stage of my life, and I'm eager to start it.

It's amazing the kind of support we're getting from friends with this new baby. It's sad not to have family around to help out, but I'm so thankful that we have an abundance of friends around us to help raise our child.

So I have a dillemma. My mother is coming to help out for a month, and she's been saying all kinds of scary things. For example, it is customary in Korean culture to stay home for about a month after you have your baby. I knew about this, but I took it with a grain of salt. Sure, I'll be resting up, eating my seaweed soup, occasionally running errands, and welcoming close friends as visitors to my home. However, I think my mom means that I LITERALLY have to stay at home for exactly one month. Or else. Or else what???? So I asked her, "So I can't take a walk outside for ten minutes?" And she replied with something like, "It's too cold. You'll be too cold to do that." Then I argued about wearing a thick coat and mittens and scarves and woolen socks, but alas, they landed on deafened ears. Her philosophy is "Don't go outside for a month because it's too cold." I have no idea where this is coming from. I secretly think that she also thinks her idea is ridiculous, but some unknown force from within is causing her to believe this with all her heart.

Anyways, I'm grateful nevertheless to have her up here to help out in the first couple of weeks. As for the whole "being out of commission for one month" thing, just know that I can not live without seeing people for more than two days. It's the extrovert in me. I remember when I got married, some of my friends wanted to "give me some room" and didn't call or email or get in touch with me so that Danny and I can have our "space" as a newlywed couple. I see the well-intentioned thought behind that, but I was ready to hang out with people the day after our honeymoon! So I think it might be the same way with the baby. Granted I will be super tired from getting up in the middle of the night, but isn't that just part of life? Aren't I tired all the time anyways? I gain energy from other people. Again, extrovert.

So what's my point? If you're my friend, please don't pull back "unnecessarily" in contacting me just because I have a baby. Sure, I might be busy sometimes feeding or bathing her, but it's just a different kind of busy-ness.

To close up, what do I know? For all I know, I might never hang out with friends ever again.