Wednesday, August 22, 2007

GUYS ONLY

Here is a picture of Danny and some of his buds from college. Henry, Danny, and John all have one toddler (plus John has an infant who is not pictured).

BTW: I love how Abby is reaching out to me, the picture taker. "Mah-mee!"

I was honored to be invited to this year's "road trip" that was GUYS ONLY for many years. I kind of felt personally responsible for making sure that people who traveled a great distance felt that their money was well-spent. Since Danny and I only had to drive to Santa Cruz, it just made sense for us to take care of local business.

But I had a huge dilemma. Since it was GUYS ONLY for such a long time, I'm not sure if they knew what a trip with GIRLS and KIDS would be like. As the weekend approached, I felt stress coming on. Who was planning the meals? What entertainment would be provided for the little tots? Was there a DVD player available? Does the beach house have cooking utensils? Does little Mary speak English? What CAN Nathaniel eat? Is it cold in Santa Cruz? Are we going to spend some time at the beach playing or just looking at the waves? Are the Yoons coming? Where is Andrew? Will Abby fight with Nathaniel? Will this be madness or happiness?

Part of it is being a mom and making sure I prepare for plan A through plan E, for the sake of my child. Another part of it is my people-pleasing personality. Still another part was the fact that I felt like we should be the "hosts," since it was in the Bay Area.

I decided to ask Danny what we should do in preparation for this trip. He just stared blankly at his computer screen and said, "I don't know. Um, I think we'll hang out at the beach." Hm... what does that mean? Should I pack all the beach necessities? Beach toys? Umbrella and towels? Sunblock! Hats, water shoes, etc.

Then I had a brilliant idea! I should call Henry! He seemed to be the top planner/organizer of the group, and will surely have an answer for me. "Henry, what should we do about breakfast on Friday, and meals in general?" His answer for me was: "We don't plan."

Hm... what does that mean? Does that mean therefore I shouldn't plan? That if I DO plan I will not be invited to any other road trips? But how can I NOT plan? This trip potentially involves FOUR babies, THREE women, and FIVE men. We'll be staying in a house in a neighborhood unbeknownst to any of us. Who knows what we will face? As a woman, "Be prepared" is my heart's natural motto. You don't even have to remind me to be prepared, I just do it instinctively.

So my dilemma was: Shall I go with the mantra of "we don't plan" and then watch four babies die, three women cringe, and five men thrive? Or shall I take matters into my own hand and do what I can so that four babies thrive, three women thrive, and five men thrive?

Needless to say, I planned for this trip. Not completely, but I did what I could to ease my stress, anxiety, and make sure that needless chaos doesn't happen. Normal, controlled chaos is fine with me, but why add needless chaos? I just hope Henry wasn't mad that "we don't plan" method was sabotaged. My number one priority was to make sure the kiddies would be fed and entertained. I shopped at Costco and Safeway for some essential breakfast food and toddler food. As for entertainment, I brought books, basket of toys, soft surface for kids to roll around on, alphabet mat, and the rest of the time, pretty much Uncle Dave took care of all the entertainment!

Anyways, I had a great time! Even though the only real time I can relax is when Abby is sleeping, I still had a generally relaxing and fun this this past weekend. My favorite part was when I walked in on the guys having a prayer meeting where they shared about what was going on in their lives and then prayed for each other. I didn't hear anything (because I forgot my glasses and one of my eye was swollen shut from a bug bite, and I really can't hear when I can't see), but it just warmed my heart to think that these guys really care about each other. I'm glad my husband has great friends like them that will surely last a lifetime.

5 comments:

HWH said...

You can't hear when you can't see? Bizarro.

Anonymous said...

thanks for planning for the kids and wives! the food and toys were great. i never thought of the opposite, that *you'd* feel like you have to people please but i guess that's true too.

i hope you had fun! see you next year!

Unknown said...

i was so stressed for you when i read this. i would've responded EXACTLY in the same way. well done, mamaj. :)

Anonymous said...

Can't...stop...laughing...

I totally understand your predicament. Sounds like you pulled it off brilliantly!

Sophia Ott said...

i agree that planning is innate to survival. i am glad it worked out! good job! and yes, i agree that it is strange you cannot hear when you cannot see. i think hearing is supposed to compensate for not seeing most times.